Tight underwear makes you less of a man. This isn’t just because tightie whities make even the manliest of men look a hopeless geek and are probably the most effective form of birth control in the known world, although there is that. No, tight literally make you less of a man, and here are five reasons you should never go near tight underwear.
They Make You Sterile
Believe it or not, there actually is a reason why your testicles are kept outside your body rather than being tucked safely up inside. Basically, your sperm need to be kept at a fairly stable temperature, around 98 degrees, and your body is able to automatically adjust the temperature by keeping them closer or farther away from your body.
This is why your boys shrivel up when they’re exposed to the cold, as your body draws them closer in an attempt to warm them up. Wearing tight underwear causes them to remain to close to the body, overheating them, which damages your sperm and makes you less fertile.
They Reduce Testosterone
Another side effect, which is related to overheating, is testosterone reduction. Testosterone is the essential make hormone, and having less of it will lead to lethargy, weaker muscles and general malaise. So, quite literally, tight underwear makes you less of a man.
They Can Cause Testicular Torsion
Testicular torsion is a condition wear your testicles become twisted and torque internally. It is extremely painful, surprisingly common and can lead to the testicle becoming gangrenous and being removed. This is not generally a problem if your testicles are free and loose, but wearing tight under can cause them to become twisted and lead to testicular torsion.
They Can Lead to Rashes
Tight underwear tend to become wet underwear when they are worn in any sort of warm environment, or when you exert yourself. This leads to your skin becoming irritated and ends up with you having, well, itchy genitals. This environment is also ripe for infection, so you have a much bigger risk of some sort of fungus developing down there. None of which will be a problem if you wear loose or, even better, no underwear.
They Look Stupid
Seriously, they just don’t look cool. What’s the point in having fertile, itch free, untwisted testicles if there is no one around to use them on. So go with boxer or go commando and your boys will thank you.